Fear is a stage of courage. Perceiving events, and emotional states, as a part of the process towards your goal will help to relieve the feeling of “stuckness” and indecision. Effectively, if you are experiencing something (fear, for example) it’s on the way to your goal, part of the road – and you have to walk through it to get to the other side.
Keep in mind that defining something as an obstacle will cause all the associations that you have with the definition of obstacle to happen to you. Obstacles are by definition for a time ‘solutionless’ = so if you call it an obstacle, in order for that definition to stay right, (and we love to be right when we are afraid ;-) think about it) you would have to block your access to solutions. Change the way you perceive an obstacle, it will change the way you feel about it and the way that you ARE ABLE TO respond to it, and thus ‘remove ‘ the obstacle. Define the “problem” as an event to interact with. This applies to the less enjoyable feeling states as well.
Being open to an experience allows you to move through it. Sometimes we resist our experiences in order to avoid the associated emotions. Everyone experiences fear and this is understandable. We are out of practice with taking risks! The more you practice taking risks, the greater will be your belief in your abilities. New experiences enable you to “stretch your muscles.” and expand your perspective about yourself and your perceived potential. By trying to protect yourself from your feelings by avoiding the situations that elicit them, you can keep yourself stuck in that state simply because you have no other experiences to create new conclusions from.
Start with something small. After a new experience, pay attention to your inner dialogue. What are you focussing on? Are you saying anything about yourself? If you find that you are judgmental and hard on yourself, you are actually reinforcing a pattern of fear. Try instead to focus on the novelty of the situation, ANY thing that you felt you did well or anything that you enjoyed. Nothing is too small. It’s huge to focus on that instead.
You undoubtedly have the capacity to develop and access all the skills and abilities that you require. Allowing yourself to go through a guided process of exploration, even though it may feel frightening, uncomfortable, uncertain – is the way to RE-cognize your freedom and trust in self.